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Oilfield Joke: Roughneck Traffic Stop…

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Oilfield Joke: Roughneck Traffic Stop…

A ROOKIE POLICE OFFICER PULLED A ROUGHNECK OVER FOR SPEEDING AND HAD THE FOLLOWING EXCHANGE:

OFFICER: MAY I SEE YOUR DRIVER’S LICENSE?

ROUGHNECK: I DON’T HAVE ONE. I HAD IT SUSPENDED WHEN I GOT MY 5TH DUI.

OFFICER: MAY I SEE THE OWNER’S CARD FOR THIS VEHICLE?

ROUGHNECK: IT’S NOT MY BIKE. I STOLE IT.

OFFICER: THE MOTORCYCLE IS STOLEN?

ROUGHNECK: THAT’S RIGHT. BUT COME TO THINK OF IT, I THINK I SAW THE OWNER’S CARD IN THE TOOL BAG WHEN I WAS PUTTING MY GUN IN THERE.

OFFICER: THERE’S A GUN IN THE TOOL BAG?

ROUGHNECK: YES SIR. THAT’S WHERE I PUT IT AFTER I SHOT AND KILLED THE DUDE WHO OWNS THIS BIKE AND STUFFED HIS DOPE IN THE SADDLE BAGS.

OFFICER: THERE’S DRUGS IN THE SADDLE BAGS TOO?!?!?

ROUGHNECK: YES, SIR. HEARING THIS, THE ROOKIE IMMEDIATELY CALLED HIS CAPTAIN. THE ROUGHNECK WAS QUICKLY SURROUNDED BY POLICE, AND THE CAPTAIN APPROACHED THE ROUGHNECK TO HANDLE THE TENSE SITUATION:

CAPTAIN: SIR, CAN I SEE YOUR LICENSE?

ROUGHNECK: SURE. HERE IT IS. IT WAS VALID.

CAPTAIN: WHO’S MOTORCYCLE IS THIS?

ROUGHNECK: IT’S MINE, OFFICER. HERE’S THE REGISTRATION.

CAPTAIN: COULD YOU SLOWLY OPEN YOUR TOOL BAG SO I CAN SEE IF THERE’S A GUN IN IT?

ROUGHNECK: YES, SIR, BUT THERE’S NO GUN IN IT. SURE ENOUGH, THERE WAS NOTHING IN THE TOOL BAG.

CAPTAIN: WOULD YOU MIND OPENING YOUR SADDLE BAGS? I WAS TOLD YOU SAID THERE’S DRUGS IN THEM.

ROUGHNECK: NO PROBLEM. THE SADDLE BAGS WERE OPENED; NO DRUGS.

CAPTAIN: I DON’T UNDERSTAND IT. THE OFFICER WHO STOPPED YOU SAID YOU TOLD HIM YOU DIDN’T HAVE A LICENSE, STOLE THIS MOTORCYCLE, HAD A GUN IN THE TOOL BAG, AND THAT THERE WERE DRUGS IN THE SADDLE BAGS.

ROUGHNECK: YEAH, I’LL BET HE TOLD YOU I WAS SPEEDING, TOO!

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